Sunday, February 24, 2013


I realized tonight that it's been a looong time since I spent some "quality time" in my beading room.  Just haven't felt inspired lately.  I dunno why.  Perhaps because I've been discouraged with some things that are happening behind the screen, but more I think because I just have been feeling kind of..... un-important.

I'm not saying I'm depressed, but just frustrated that people who SHOULD care for us - continue to refuse care to me.  It hurts my feelings, but more than that, it makes me sad that the reason I feel this way is because I feel unwanted and unworthy.  Now, many might think "oh gee - she's feeling bad because she's single".... no.... I'm feeling bad because DOCTORS are treating me this way.  (BTW - don't we PAY them to care about us?)  Why is that acceptable?  I didn't ASK for the issues I have, I didn't PICK them, I didn't CHOOSE them.... so why is it ok for someone to tell me that they don't want me?  *I* didn't have that choice.  Do these people REALIZE the message that they sending?  The message is "you're not worth my time" - then they wonder why depression is so rampant.  Really?!

Friday, February 15, 2013

Craft Night!

Here it is - or was - Valentines Day and I find myself single - again.  In years past, I've often had parties to celebrate singleness, done Mystery Dinners, and all kinds of other fun evenings with lots of friends and great memories.  This year, I was feeling kinda down not knowing what I was going to do, because I'm still new here and still feel pretty dis-connected.  I don't feel like I have a flowing group of friends that I can call at the drop of a hat to hang out for the evening, go do something crazy or just hang out.  (For the record, I've been here since August and I've not had one friend (non-family member) come to my home or frankly, even know where it is)

Since I've been here, I've done my best to attend a weekly Bible study with some ladies.  I've struggled to feel like I fit in and feeling like I'm not liked.  More importantly, I feel like it doesn't matter if I'm there or not - which makes it even harder for someone who has struggled with social anxiety, since becoming chronically ill, to feel like they "belong".

Well, on Tuesday, after our study - I was talking with 2 other girls and discussing what we were going to do tonight, after dinner.  I offered to bring supplies to make bracelets.  I just kinda threw the idea out and it seemed to be well received.  So, as I started to plan for this (mind you, 48 hours ago) I realized that if I was going to do this - I wanted to bring out the 'good stuff'.  We, as single women, are often discounted as not valuable because we're not married.  The truth is - we're the 'good stuff' in God's eyes!  SO, knowing that I'd want to bring Swarovski, Preciosa and other high quality beads I realized that I didn't have enough for a group of  up-to 10.  I needed a plan change - and quick.  I came up with the idea to make pendants.

I brought some glass tiles, some 'glossy accents' and scrapbook papers and we went to work.  We had so much fun cutting things out, being creative and laughing!  I also told the ladies about my angst of not having enough of the 'good stuffs' to bring for the class, so I brought small little Swarovskis and put one on each of the girls bails (the little metal piece which makes a little piece of something into a pendant), before they glued them on. *OOOH I love me some phone photos - still sad my camera is holed up in my storage unit in Virginia =(*

It turned out to be a great night - full of home cooked food, hand crafted pendants and remembering that WE are God's Swarovski - Shining like the sun, for HIM!

Thursday, February 14, 2013


Yep - that's right - I sold one of the pieces (the one below) I made for the No-Show!  SO excited that despite the stinko situation, I was true to myself and true to the beautiful pieces that I make. 

I went to a show this weekend, it was pretty d-e-d...however a very sweet woman came to my table (I was tucked away from the main rooms) and she fell in LOVE with this necklace!  I felt like a SuperStar!  It just reminded me that regardless of how discouraged I feel, God has given me this talent.

The other thing I'm reminded of is that OTHER PEOPLE LIKE MY STUFF! Ok, some of you are like 'Duh!  That's why you're selling, right?' - well kinda - but the truth is - I sell so I can feed my beading habit.  =)  The whole process just reminded how important it is to remember that this woman (No-Show) liked my jewelry that I had made just for fun - not because I was trying to make something specifically for a wedding.  It also reminded me of how fragile my feelings toward my work can be so easily be broken. 

I  realized that I pour so much of ME into each piece I make.  Every time I make something - a piece of me goes with it.  That's either really COOL to think or really CREEPY. =)

Friday, February 8, 2013

You are an Obsession....Your my obsession...

Pearls.  It's true.  I can admit it.  Pearls are my obsession.  Why?  They're beautiful.  They're classic. They NEVER go out of style.  Did I mention they are beautiful?

I've got a show tomorrow and this last week I took out all my pieces to decide where to put what (after removing Christmas-y pieces) and it was like a sea of pearls!  (HAHA!  A SEA of Pearls!)  I didn't realize how many pieces I had made with them in it...matte pearls, big pearls, little pearls, colored pearls, white pearls... Pearls! Pearls! Pearls!  Could be worse I guess...could be poo!

Saturday, February 2, 2013


So, I was at a certain fast food restaurant a few weeks ago...buying my extraordinarily healthy dinner of fries and a smoothie, when a gal behind the counter said 'Oh my gosh I love your necklace!'... of course I said 'Oh thank you.  I made it and I sell them.' - you would have thought I was giving money away!  Women came from the deepest recesses of this store to see my necklace and get my card.  One of them asked 'Oh, do you have a catalog or something?' to which I responded that no, I don't have one as I'm the only designer and make it all myself.  She got me to thinking that maybe she's on to something.... maybe I SHOULD do a catalog.  What do you think?

- I make several different types of jewelry
- It would put images of my products into many ppls hands without having to drag pieces everywhere I went (although I do anyway)
- It would remove the internet barrier, meaning, them going home, pulling out my card and actually looking at my website
- It would offer me a way to leave my tracks in places I go...i.e., offices, churches, restaurants

- Price - NOT cheap
- I do 'one of a kind', which means that once the piece is sold, it's gone - thereby making the piece in the catalog void
- Prices can change
- Because I make each of my pieces, all are copywritten - the risk of copycats increases (although maybe that's a Pro?)
- Do I put my phone number on them?  Maybe the whole world doesn't need to know how to contact me =)

 Here are some examples of different types of jewelry I make:

Hand knotted pearls:

ChainMaille Bracelets:

Hand poured resin (Also do pendant parties where you can make them too!):


Badge Holders:



Friday, February 1, 2013